Boot camp and hyper-sensitive YET AGAIN!

So today I had my boot camp, which is great because I went out with friends over the weekend and overindulged.   Heck, I'm human and it happens.  It happens to everyone at some point, thin or fat!  So, I'm not going to beat myself up about it.  It's in the past and I can't change it.  Yes, I'm disappointed in myself but I'm already back on track.  What was that old saying?  Don't total the car just because you put a dent in it.

During boot camp, the instructor (who is also one of my yoga instructors) told the class that I was double-jointed and that's why I was deep into a position.  After class, when there were only about 5 of us left  I went up to her and said "you're funny, but I'm not double-jointed.  Just flexible", with a smile on my face.  One of the other ladies said that she noticed that I have quite a high kick.  I told her that it's because I used to be in dance (decades ago now!) and she said 'oh that explains it' and the instructor said "no it doesn't, she was born that way'.  So I explained, again, that I wasn't always flexible but being in dance certainly made me that way.  I remember quite well what I used to be like, thank you.  Why does this upset me? The only reason I can think of to explain why it irked me so badly is that right now I have one fitness 'accomplishment', one thing that I do better than average and it's being reduced to 'oh you were born that way'.   So, I wrote the instructor an email and apologized for being prickly, but reiterated that I wasn't always flexible.  Who really cares?  What the heck is wrong with me?  I used to be really easy-going and wouldn't have EVER mentioned anything before.  I really like and respect this instructor so hopefully I haven't ruined any friendly feelings there.

So, this week I have scheduled my fitness into my busy work/school schedule.  I find writing it down immensely helpful.  For one thing, I can add up my cardio, strength training and yoga hours ahead of time to see if I'm where I should be, and if not then I can play with it.  I find this better than scrambling at the end of the week.  Also, on the day in question,  I just have to look at what I'm supposed to be doing, and when (if it's a class).  That way I'm not standing around wondering, 'should I take that class or just do the bike today?'  or 'should I do strength training first and then cardio?' etc.  Big time wasters and lack of time used to be my number one excuse for not exercising.  Or worse - I deliberate for so long that the class is going to start soon and then I end up not going at all.  

I phoned my mother today (always a bad time, and I have to do it every Sunday) and she said that she had shown one of her friends a recent picture of me. She said that her friend remarked that I looked like I had lost weight.  She also said that my sister and brother-in-law also thought the same thing.  So I said, yes, I've lost a bit (that's my mother in the picture with me btw) and then she demanded to know how much so I said "I have no idea, a bit" (if I told her 75 pounds then she would exclaim something like 'what? how much did you weigh?  you 're still fat, so you must have been over 200 pounds overweight!  what is wrong with you?' etc).  Then I got a lecture about how I finally look kind of nice and that I shouldn't just put it all back on again etc. etc. ETC.....!!!  (see, there's that appearance over health thing rearing its ugly head again lol). What's funny is that my mother saw me live and in person and didn't notice a thing.   I hadn't seen her in over a year and what she noticed was my hair LOL  I'm so thankful we live across the country from each other and I don't have to listen to this daily anymore!  Before you think I'm an ungrateful daughter, I'll just say that she's an extremely difficult woman with some serious issues and leave it at that.
 
Wow, this is the longest blog in history I think! 
 
I hope you all have a great week!
 
-Stef